“If you’re complaining so much about it, then it’s probably time that you do something about it.”
That’s the advice my husband lovingly gave to me after I had been going on and on about something I was frustrated about a few days ago. We can be transparent here, right? Okay, good. I struggle a lot with pride. A LOT. A LOT A LOT.
Can I get an amen?!
No just me? 😉
I mean, I don’t think I realized how bad it was until just recently…but now that I’ve seen pride rear it’s ugly head in my life, I can’t unsee it. It’s the silent motivation behind much of what I do, and this week has been especially eye-opening for me in regards to my pride and arrogance.
You see, earlier this week I was pretty frustrated about something. I was all up in arms about wanting to show off my talent. I wanted to display my greatness. I wanted to be noticed for my gifts.
So Alex suggested that I say something. That I step forward and make what I wanted known. The whole, “you’ll never get what you want if you don’t say something” thing. Totally good advice that I would have normally agreed with in a heartbeat. But he didn’t know about the inner pride thing.
And that changes everything.
My husband’s suggestion for my problem would have been brilliant…if I had been upset for the right reasons. If I had some motivation for God’s glory somewhere within the frustration. But in fact, there was none of that. I had plenty of thoughts about Carisa’s glory and not so many about the Kingdom of God.
Pride breeds discontentment. It makes us unhappy with our current situation. It makes us think that we deserve something better because we are better. And pride makes it all about us when it should be all about God.
They are not my talents.
They are not my gifts.
My own greatness does not exist.
Everything that I physically have and all that is within me is on loan from God.
In the midst of my frustration, I felt God gently placing guidance upon my heart. I don’t need to move. I don’t need to speak out. I don’t need to ask for something more than I have at the moment.
In this season of my life, I need to wait. I need to pray. I need to be still.
Wait for contentment.
Wait for peace.
Wait for pride to be replaced with faithfulness.
Wait for God to call me to move.
This isn’t laziness or complacency. This is obedience.